Why i chose myself to be me.


I am a weird person. I like things which no one ever heard of. At least people my age have not. I like Psychedelic music, while my friends mostly do not. I know a bunch of pervert jokes. And i am known as a person who knows dark sick humor. I am a short tempered person, and i snap at just anyone and everyone who pisses me.

I am a weird person.  I like things which no one does.

When i was a kid, i remember i used to have a lot of imaginary friends (who doesn’t ) and then friends turned into a world..an imaginary world. Kids who have imaginary friends mostly are loners…i used to have a group of 21 girlfriends…and a bunch of imaginary friends. How cool is that.

I used to ( and still am ) be a bully..and i used to get into random fights and all. But i also used to be good at studies. I mean i was an above average student. I had a good grip of things, except math of course..i hate maths. I used to be a tomboy. And i used to run around in college doing small favors my teachers asked me to.

I got selected as the class monitor almost every academic year. I used be a good girl. I had a fancy to so many things. I remember that when i was in sixth grade, i wanted to be everything….a spy, an astronaut, a lawyer, an accomplished business person,  a scientist…everything.

I used to look at the stars and they were my friends. I used to notice which star is where and vice verse.

But then things changed……I grew up!

I was still that bright student, and i still used to think in multidimensional prospects. i used to observe more cleverly. I figured out what i wanted, i wanted everything. My circle of friends grew. And so did y imaginary world.

Then i grew up more.

I came to realization that you can not live in fickle imagination any more. Reality has a place for you. I became more frustrated. I stopped liking things. I stopped smiling. I mean i still smile..but it is just …a smile…not eternal. I became a rude person.

I started writing….and discovered that i used to write even when i was a kid. I had apparently forgotten that. Although i have a good memory. A very good one actually. I remember things about my childhood, that not a lot of people remember.

I grew sad and got  bored of everything. I started taking wide interest in the surrounding, the world politics.

I used to be very interested in nature…now i am just interested in it.

I became very possessive of everything. I say things which i do not mean and then regret saying all that. And it is not a good feeling i tell you.

I became a saint…well kind of a saint.

I have, as my friends put it, more than one personalities. Sometimes it is good sometimes bad. See multidimensional.

So why did i choose a person like myself..to be me.

You see i did not. ME was there always. ME was picked by nature. ME was a gift.

If we are given an option to choose the people we want to be..we will choose to be perfectionists. And then the world will be filled with *hooligans*. Because perfectionists are one dimensional.

If i has chosen my self to be some one other than myself i would not have liked it. And that is what makes me unique, different.

I like being different. Because other wise i would have been like the rest of the people.

So you see..i did not choose my self to be me. It was always there. ME was always there. ME can not be more better.